Sometimes I find myself on the brink, bearly holding back the emotions that are lurking behind the gates ready to destroy me. I push them back into subconscious, their taste too bitter and their weight too heavy to swallow.

The rawness of the reality we've been exposed to is sometimes too real to digest and yet that is the exact reason we've exposed ourselves to it in the first place. Experimentaton is one of the more facinating concepts I've ever encountered - adventure, risk, discovery, exploration... Challenging myself and testing my limits and approaching some unknown potential within myself are things in which I hope to measure my life.

The Year of the Monkey has come to mind on more than one occasion and for various reasons, some of which I will keep to myself. I will say that grooming makes me happy.

Since celibacy seems to be inevitable here, one may wonder the methods for compensation. Well oddly enough, there's some grotesque satisafaction (fetish?) in itching mosquito bites until you break skin. I have 23 mosquito bites right now. =)

I have seen beaucoup de scarification here and I wish it for myself. Perhaps, a treat for myself at the end of a 2 year journey.

My post will require me to become an awesome bike rider. Biker Butt here I come!

"...what I learned about myself was like a reminder of something I'd once known but had nearly forgotten - namely, that beneath the elegant clothing and the accomplished dancing, and the clever conversation, my life had no complexity at all..." -Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden